The girl at office..

In the dying hours of another V-day spent alone, I can't help but reminisce about her..

So much for not dipping your pen into the company ink. Here goes..

I see her often at office. I wish I could say I see her everyday. But history bears testimony to the fact that fate has long been the tormentor of love. Sometimes we talk, and sometimes we don't. But I hardly notice that, because she speaks to me beyond words. Her very presence speaks to my soul. When I can see her, I don't just see. I observe. I hear. I smell. I taste. I feel. She makes me understand what John Denver was referring to when he sang "You fill up my senses".

The gal who struck up the conversation with me on the first day, when I was still gathering courage to smile at her.

The gal who used to pretend she didn't notice when I walked in through the door of the training room, only to check me out later when I was busy with my work.

The gal who was unsure of exactly how far I would allow someone while having a personal discussion.

The gal who was genuinely concerned more about me cracking the acceptance test than herself.

The gal who tries to be by my side in a group photo, even if it means me holding a couple of fingers as horns behind her head.

The gal who smiles assuringly at me when someone opposes my opinion over something.

The gal who likes to say "thank you" or "sorry" to me once in a while, for reasons that generally escape me.

The gal who likes to pretend that she didn't really care, when I open a door for her, or walk on the outer side of the street.

The gal who keeps track of how long it has been since we had a photo taken of just the two of us.

The gal who blushes and lowers her gaze when I just look into her eyes without smiling when she wishes me goodmorning.

The gal who pauses outside the music room and listens to me pounding on the drums, or strumming the strings, without coming in because she thinks it would distract me.

The gal who sometimes gives me big, warm smiles for apparently no reason at all.

The gal who reads up on some topics on wikipedia, that she knows I'm currently high on, just so that she can understand what the blabbering is all about.

The gal who assures me that it makes her feel good when I am protective of her, when I express my doubts about how far people should interfere in each other's lives.

The gal who gives me the whole box of traditional sweets sent to her from home, because she knows I love them.

The gal who sends me meaningless messages over chat when she can't think of anything to say to start the conversation.

The gal who calls me names, or pretends to be angry at me, if she feels that I haven't been giving her attention for the last few days.

The gal who I can compliment just by smiling at her and nodding my head in silent approval.

The gal whose cute nose wiggles ever so slightly, acting as a give-away sign, when she disapproves of something.

The gal who pretends to be not very hungry and asks me to finish her tiffin, as she knows I crave home-cooked food.

The gal who wears a new accessory to office and then waits patiently for me to take notice.

The gal who puts up with my wierd ideas and numerous offshoots in the course of a discussion.

The gal who sometimes stays back late because my work is not done, just so that we can go back in the same bus.

The gal who then lets me sleep on the bus, even though she wants to talk.

The gal who holds my hand just a jiffy too long when we shake hands.

The gal who learns the crazy handshakes I teach her and agrees to do them everytime we meet.

The gal who pauses a moment before we part everytime, evaluating the possibility of a good-bye hug.

The gal who gently snuggles up to me when I place an arm around her, and sometimes lays her head gently on my shoulder.

The babe with the beautiful hair.

The hot chick with the long legs, AND high heels.

The enchantress with the mesmerizing eyes.

I could go on and on.. But there's just one thing I'd like to say:

I really wish all of these were the one, same gal!

Hahaha! Valentine's fool!!

But on a personal note, a big, warm hug to all my female friends who can relate to something above. You are indeed special to me, and in my own quirky way, I love you more than you'll ever know.

Keep the faith,

Av

A knot in time..

This is a thread of thought that emerged in the course of a very "no-souls-barred" discussion that I had with one of my close friends in Pune. I thought I would like to share it with everyone else. Here goes:

Once in a while, everyone tends to have a really deep, meaningful discussion with a friend, a parent, a spouse or a total stranger. In retrospect, a great conversation feels like a great moment that you share forever with that person. I like to think of it as a little private isle that the two of you discovered in the middle of the ocean, hidden from everyone else.

On the surface, a great conversation seems to be all about two people sharing a moment. But dive underneath the surface of momentary perception into the waters of continually observing consciousness and the paradigm changes. To me, a conversation is like a game of chess. At every point, there are numerous ways in which it could develop, depending on what you say, or how you percieve what the other person has said and what thoughts, feelings or emotions it triggers inside you. And vice-versa.

In this perspective it is quite obvious to conclude that the way one reacts to something is not governed by causes which are ephemeral. Rather it is governed by your whole life. By your perceptions of all the experiences you have had, the subconscious co-relations that you have made, and the inferences you have drawn from them. It is about the fact that when you really speak from the heart to someone whom you trust with your real emotions, you are bringing your whole self, your complete existence to the table, to that ONE moment in time.

Secondly, when you really open up to someone and share with them the very core of your feelings, and the other person does the same, both the persons are in a place where they are quite vulnerable. The beauty of that moment always outlasts the momentary, and the warm fuzzy feeling inside oneself that you take away is most certainly far from evanescent.

I like to think of a two people sharing a great conversation as two long threads in time, intertwining for a brief moment before flowing off in different directions again. It is like a reference point that you can mentally re-visit at will, and it will remind you of all the warmth that you have in your life. Quite contrary to Mr Schopenhauer's theory, eh?

On a lighter note, is that why they say that love is a knotty affair??

Luv-n-Luck,

Av

When Love kills Love

Since today morning, I have been listening to a single song on infinite loop so I thought that I would share it with everyone. The song is called When Love Kills Love and its by the band Scorpions. Scorpions has always been one of my favourite bands for their uncanny ability to strike an amazing balance between intensity and sensitivity. Then, a few weeks ago, I bought a DVD of their concert Acoustica and life hasn't been the same ever since. The concert was performed inside a monastery called Convento do Beato in Lisbon, Portugal. The DVD was shot using 12 cameras and needless to say, is breathtaking. The ensemble included a piano, a cello and an extra percussion section other than the regular band members. They performed a nice mix of their all time hits, a few new songs and even a couple of covers, totalling up to 21 songs. The most amazing part is that the music arrangements for all the songs were completely re-done for the acoustic instruments setup. Absolutely a must-check-out piece of rock music history!

The lyrics for the song are also superbly written. Listen closely!
Here's the song:


This is probably the first and only acoustic song yet to which I have head-banged like I did today morning. I just couldn't resist its groovy feel. Also, I thought that it would make an interesting follow-up to the last post, giving the Hedgehog's Dilemma a new, intriguing twist!
In closing, here are my instantaneous thoughts on the topic:

When love kills love
Its just love gone blind
For true love never dies
Lingers on in heart & mind

When love kills love
Its no more than suicide
I thought I had you killed
But it was me who died..

Luv-n-luck,
Av

A picture, a story, a song, a theory, a thought and a poem!

Once upon a time on a very cold winter night (unlike what winter pretends to be, here in Pune), a group of hedgehogs was shivering in their little hole in the ground. Misery written all over their little snouts, they were praying for the first sign of summer and huddling together for some warmth. This was when an interesting situation presented itself. When they were apart, they would feel cold, and when they came closer to share their heat, their spines would hurt each other. So they had to choose either cold over pain or pain over cold.

Kelly Rowland and Nelly collaborated on a totally awesome rap/hip-hop song called DILEMMA, that I absolutely love. It won the 2003 Grammy Award for Best Rap/Sung Collaboration. Its one of the most groovy songs I've ever heard and makes me wanna dance every single time I hear it. Check it out!

But I'm sure you wonder why am I talking about this odd combination of a creature and two crooners?? Well, that needs yet another pic, and here it is!

This (not-so-friendly-looking) gentleman was named Arthur Schopenhauer. His work has influenced people right from the composer Richard Wagner to the psychoanalytic psychiatrist Sigmund Freud. Mr. Schopenhaeur was the first one to refer to a social psychology phenomenon called the Hedgehog's Dilemma, in his book called Parerga und Paralipomena. The theory basically refers to a metaphoric situation described in the story above, with the argument that even with the best interests in mind, intimacy in human relations can not occur without harm to both the persons involved. This leads to over-cautious behavior, which is directly responsible for fragile relationships. A corollary to this, also proposed in the same book is that if one posses enough internal warmth, one can avoid society and subsequently the psychological discomfort (argued to be) inevitable from social interaction.

To me, the paradoxical part of the theory is that such behavior is actually in the interest of both the people involved, because it protects them from the risk of getting hurt. Another funny part is that the behavior occurs inspite of sharing a goodwill and intention of a close relationship.

Secondly, the corollary is used to explain introversion and isolationism. I might be wrong, but somehow I just can't bring myself to believe that most of the people who exhibit these characteristics are really 'internally warm'. To make things complicated, I myself display traces of both the behaviours (though I've managed to tone things down over the past few years). I can surely vouch for the fact that a lot of times, it is not because you are feeling "warm enough' or for self-protection, but just because you are in a brainspace where you don't want your thoughts to be disturbed. Sometimes it might also occur because you dont psychologically percieve the interaction with or the company of a set of people (or society in general) as a high-value proposition. Then again, is that exactly what Mr. Schopenhauer refers to as "warmth"? Am I contradicting myself? Tell me what you think about this. I would love to hear your thoughts.

Just in keeping with the theme of this post, I want to end it with an anonymous poem titled

The Dilemma

To laugh is to risk appearing a fool.
To weep is to risk appearing sentimental.
To reach out for another is to risk involvement.
To expose feelings is to risk rejection.
To place your dreams before the crowd is to risk ridicule.
To love is to risk not being loved in return.
To go forward in the face of overwhelming odds is to risk failure.
But risks must be taken because the greatest hazard in life is to risk nothing.
The person who risks nothing does nothing, has nothing, is nothing.
He may avoid suffering and sorrow, but he cannot learn, feel, change, grow or love.
Chained by his certitudes, he is a slave.
He has forfeited his freedom.
Only a person who takes risks is free.

Luv-n-Luck,
Av

Rendezvous with Excellence!

Today was a special day indeed. I had a rare opportunity to meet, listen to and personally interact with somebody who has made India proud at the highest level in his chosen field. Its was a wonderful privilege.

The first impression that Pullela Gopichand leaves on your is the absolute inner peace that reflects from his demeanor. That is just moments before you realize that he is a very quiet man outwardly too. A few minutes into the talk, and he unravels the mystery: "If you have a legal[sic] vent to all the energy inside you, it makes you peaceful at all other times".

What I liked the most about Gopi, as he's fondly called (but apparently dislikes), was that he has struck the fine balance between being humble, but being unapologetically proud of his accomplishments, without trying to play down the price he has paid for them. Being soft-spoken, but at the same time, being able to verbalize his love and commitment towards the sport, in an infectiously passionate manner, that left the whole auditorium awe-struck.

When asked what sacrifices he made on the demanding road to success, he stumped everybody with the elusively obvious, simple reasoning of: "If you love what you are doing, nothing else that you give up feels like a sacrifice" .

And finally, I asked him what he thought about Malcolm Gladwell's 10,000 Hour Theory , and if out of his experience as a player and a coach, he could quantify success. He just gave one of his soothing smiles, and as the picture inset above was taken, said the words that will stay with me for the rest of my life: "I know only one number for success. 100. Give it your 100% !".

I Will!
Av

P.S. - A load of thanks to my friend Sayo for the timely snap!

Stuff I'm listening to..

I thought that I would share with everyone what I've been listening to throughout all weekend. The inset vidz are actually only audios, so that you don't get distracted from the music.

Lets start with some hip-hop (yes, this is still Av posting!)

This one's by a Toronto based nu-funk band called GOD MADE ME FUNKY! Its called LUV T'DAY and is on the OST of American Pie: Beta House. It plays during the pool party in the very last scene. I love the groove. Check it out!



This is a heavy one by the immensely skilled band Necrophagist. Their genre of music, believe it or not, is called Technical Death Metal.

This last one is by DEEP PURPLE. Its called SOMETIMES I FEEL LIKE SCREAMING, and its what I've been listening to the whole last week, not just the weekend. The lazy-sounding leads by Steve Morse are addictive!



There you go. My musical palette for most of the weekend, spanning three musical styles, laid out for you. Hope you like it!

Luv-n-Luck,
Av

Genius!!

As you can see on the right, I have added a fresh new widget to the blog. Its from the CriticsRant blog readability test. According to it, you apparently need to be a genius to read and understand this blog. So for all the folks who have been happily following the random ramblings in this tiny corner of cyber-space, CONGRATS! You are all Geniuses!

I tried a number of blogs in the link, and no other blog gave the same result as this one. For a while, this massaged my bloated ego to great comfort. Then, suddenly sense raised its logical head. If a blog required the reader to be a genius to understand it, then given the statistic of only about 2% of population being geniuses, most people would not be able to follow it! Hmmm.. that kinda explains the dearth of comments. :D

Speaking of geniuses, Malcolm Gladwell's latest book has stirred up quite a hornet's nest by its unique take on the idea of genius. He argues that if you dedicate 10,000 hours of your life to ANYTHING that you are "just about okay" at, you shall get "world-class" at it. Now that offers some hope, doesnt it?

The argument presented is on similar lines of what one great polymath, Herb Simon proposed many many years back, saying that to become an expert required about 10 years of experience and internalizing about 50,000 chunks of information. One of his students called Anders Ericsson took it a step further when he developed the Theory of Skilled Memory. (Warning - pedantic link!!)

Probably to spice up the other end of the spectrum, Mr Gladwell also presents extensive statistical data to suggest that "making it big" is also a function hugely dependent on luck, principally in the form of where and when you were born. The data he has researched and put together is quite compellingly varied and hence comes dangerously close to destroying the idea of the self-made man.

Book reviews on the net fire away at how the arguments are not watertight, and indeed the 10,000 Hour criteria can surely not be heralded as a Necessary-and-Sufficient condition for success. Neither necessary nor sufficient, actually. The Beatles surely did not jam around for 10,000 hours before they made it big. Nor is every guitarist who has been playing for 20 years in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame.

But everything else apart, I really believe that the author's strength does not lie in presenting impeccable arguments. His forte is writing about abstract concepts, through the use of anecdotes and everyday examples, to arrive at a way of conveying slippery theories, that is at once vibrant, riveting and memorable. That is something he has always succeeded admirably at ever since his first book. Which is exactly what makes him dangerous. A gullible reader runs the very real risk of believing ideas which may not be that firmly rooted in reality.

In closing, a humbling quote by the great critic George Bernard Shaw, who has had something to say about practically everything under the sun:
"Common sense is instinct. Enough of it is genius."

Luv-n-Luck,
Av