December 4, 2008

Cyclic Expressionism contd...

Thoughts from today morning:

"Child is the Father of Man"
"Father is the Man of Child"
"Man is the Child of Father"
"Child is the Man of Father"
"Father is the Child of Man"
"Man is the Father of Child"

All of these seem to make sense too!!!
Alright, no more.. this is getting weird..
:D

December 3, 2008

Necessity is the mother of invention..

"Mothers are the Necessity of Invention"
I had used this corollary of the famous quote while referring to birth-control measures, en-route to winning a debate competition a coupla months back. Quite a few people got that one after they went home. :D

It got me thinking of all the other corollaries..

1) "Mother is the Invention of Necessity"
2) "Invention is the Necessity of Mother"
3) "Necessity is the Invention of Mother"
4) "Invention is the Mother of Necessity"

All of them seem logical in some context or the other! Funny isn't it??
Cyclic Expressionism!

November 27, 2008

RIP Mumbai


Through a curious turn of events, I was right on Nepean Sea Road, South Mumbai when the two blasts occurred in the vicinity of the area last night. For the first time in my life, I actually heard the "boom" of two bombs going off. The first blast was a moment which escapes definition by me. In one split second, for the first time in my life, I felt first-hand, what terror feels like and how it can cause cataclysmic disturbances in the peaceful life of people far removed from the actual cause; physically, mentally and opinion-wise. More importantly, I could realize how the horror is not even remotely close or even similar to the "harbinger-of-doom" phrases used by our idiotic media to grab eyeballs. They just dont "get it".

Case in point, an instance where somebody trapped inside the TAJ hotel (in which the militants had held up hostages) gave one of the News Channels a direct call. The poor soul was repeatedly saying in English that they need help and that the commandos should rapidly advance to the higher floors. At this point of time, the News anchor was stupid enough to utter,"Kya aa hamaare darshakon ko HINDI (sic) me bataa sakte hain ki wahaan ki sthiti kya hai??"
I rest my case.

On the other hand, big-time respect to all the army/police/commando officers who rose to the call of duty and did not flinch to lay down their lives in the process. The nation, even though shaken, stands proud. Peace to you.

What really got to me was the after-thought that the people in terror-affected areas around the country (and indeed, around the world) live in this dark shadow all of their lives. 24X7. And still manage to smile. Kudos to them all, in the wake of the realization that sitting inside an AC room/office, one can never "get it". No amount of News Channel coverage can ever hope to make you feel it. You have to experience the clutching feeling in your own chest. Your dreams, your aspirations, your memories, your grudges, your plans, your vision, your abilities, your very existence suddenly gasping for breath. The sudden realization of how easily and unpredictably it might all come to an end for no reason or cause, for you or against you.

On a optimistic note, as I made my way back to Pune this morning, I saw Mumbai trying to creep back to normalcy, even though the crisis was not yet over. Just one word came to my mind. Resilience. Salaam Mumbai..

But the events of the past 24 hours have triggered a chain reaction inside me, which forces me to re-think, re-consider, re-define and re-arrange the priority order of my life. I think it should indeed be a periodic exercise to examine if the things that we give the greatest part of our time, energy and our very lives are really worth it.

I want to close this post with a quote that I hold very close to my heart:
"The true measure of a man's wealth is what he has invested in eternity."

Peace to the departed souls,
Av

November 26, 2008

Quote of the day...

“Some scientists claim that hydrogen, because it is so plentiful, is the basic building block of the universe. I dispute that. I say there is more stupidity than hydrogen, and that is the basic building block of the universe.”
- Frank Zappa

"Not only is stupidity the most abundant element, it is also the lightest. It seems to make people rise up in an organizational hierarchy faster than anything else."
- Av's corollary
(derived through experience in the corporate world)

Av

November 24, 2008

Glimpses from Sinhagad

Hi Everyone!

Incase you are wondering where I got that lovely snap from the last post, let me tell you I have taken the shot myself! On an otherwise would-be non-descript friday, I had gone biking up Sinhagad with a few of my KPIT cronies!

Presenting, the gang!


The moon reflected in the waters of the Khadakwasla Dam, en-route to Sinhagad!


The mesmerizing view from atop..


Some random photography..






When life and dreams collide!


And finally, as you can see, I have an almost unhealthy penchant for shooting bugs!


It was fantastic to take some time out and slow down for a while. I was feeling all relaxed even after two days! I guess the little trip really soothed everyone's nerves a bit.
It was a pretty creative time. While I was running around taking snaps, "shighra-kavi" Sudip composed a poem! Even I composed half a poem, but was too taken up by things begging to be photographed to complete it. I did have a good conversation with a certain Mr Tanaji Malusare, though!

All in all, it was a great time! Even though we had to ride straight back into office after that!

Luv-n-Luck,
Av

November 18, 2008

Stand in my Shadow


Stand here in my shadow,
Stay safe under my wing,
Fear not the many struggles
That tomorrow shall bring;

Take some time to introspect
Just a moment's silent repose,
Learn to smile under the rain,
If you aspire for the rainbows;

Take life along where you go
Be dragged not in life's wake,
All that your life will ever be
Is what you decided to make;

Leave behind all your regrets
Break free of your every guilt,
Brick by brick, hope by hope
Is how your life shall be built;

Live each moment to its fullest
Heed the old words of the wise,
Whether you be tiny or be huge
Remember to live life king-size!

Av

November 17, 2008

A small spark..




There is something cool about saying - "I come from the land of a billion sparks!"

This sentence, spoken by Chetan Bhagat a few months back at Symbiosis College here in Pune, has somehow stuck in my head. Yesterday I saw one possible interpretation of it.

I was riding along the road, when I saw a spark. Or I thought I did, cause it was something really bright. Turned out to be a smile. A bright radiant smile. It was serene, and not even remotely defiant, but it almost seemed to mock at the countless scowls that surrounded it. Maybe that contrast was exactly what made it stand out so starkly. It was the best smile that I've seen in weeks. It came from a soul. It came from a heart. The heart of a man who was happy.

A man who was carefree.
A man who was living in the moment, without the past weighing him down, or the future pulling him ahead too fast.
A man who was either completely oblivious or absolutely immune (or both) to his surroundings.
A man at peace.
A man, who was standing on top of a heap of waste-bags loaded into a garbage truck.

Surrounded by busy, "successful" people with "respectable jobs", holding their handkerchiefs to their noses, but trying to go around the garbage truck, acting as if the truck itself did not exist, leave alone the man perched on top of it.

A single smiling human amongst a wave of mindless rat-robots... That's a spark for you!

Av

November 11, 2008

Hibernation Update - 2

Hi everyone,
The suspense is over. The results are out!
I am now a certified Nutrition & Wellness Advisor.
Get over it. Its true.
:D
Luv-n-Luck,
Av

PS - Oh btw, I scored 95% on the certification exam.

October 24, 2008

Hibernation update..

Hi everyone,

Especially everyone who has been pestering me to post something. :P
I am presently on intellectual hibernate mode, but having said that, I do have something up my sleeves that I shall be posting soon.

P.S. - For all the people who are wondering about my Orkut line (Exams Rock!), the result of my exam should be out VERY soon, and I'll be posting it here.. :D
Watch this space!

Luv-n-Luck,
Av

July 14, 2008

Blogging on the "FLY"!!

For a few days, I was thinking about what would be a good follow up to the last post. Then it struck me that yet another one of my compositions is in a similar vein to the last one, in terms of the hope, possibility and anticipation. Also the theme of this one is also loosely based on the idea of rising to the next level. What is interesting is that this composition also plays upon Death and Life using the word "fly". However, in juxtaposition to the last post, the word "fly" denotes going away from Death, and not closer to it. These two compositions were written by me as an exercise in twisting ideas and words around to suit one's intentions. (Its not actually as evil as it sounds.. Hehe..)

The real story behind the curtain is that ever since the first time I read William Wordsworth's and Robert Herrick's contrasting poems on daffodils in fifth grade, I always wanted to compose about something from two points of view. With these two compositions, I have not exactly done that, in the sense that both the compositions are in a optimistic vein. However I have endeavoured to treat a single word in two exactly opposite contexts. While the last song dwells on the absolute, unchanging finality, this one talks about

WINDS OF CHANGE

You've lived this life
One moment too long,
Just leave it behind
With me come along,

You're trapped in your world
You're trapped in your mind
Its time you wake up and
Leave this illusion behind.. (1)

Take off your masks
Shed off your skins,
Get out of these
Cities of ruins,

Lets sail to those lands
far beyond the sea
And when we reach there
You'll be glad you came with me.. (2)

Fly with me my friends,
Fly with me tonight..
Fly high my brothers,
Fly by my side..

Lets fly..
To where the children of tomorrow spread their wings,
Lets fly..
To where every moment new joys brings,
Lets fly..
To the world which yet seems out of our range,
Lets fly..
Gliding along the winds of change..

Now its time, to move ahead,
Now its time, to leave the pain,
Now its time, to come back from the dead,
Now its time, to live again...

Just as a sidenote, this was the song that I'd sung for my first-ever public performance with the guitar, and that after about 5 years, I sung it again for my guitar students last sunday. :D

Luv-n-Luck,
Av

June 19, 2008

ITS TIME..

I woke up today morning inexplicably humming a little something that I'd composed years before, and it took my mind back to the that time, which was a very uphill, learning period in my life. It also made me ponder upon the importance of keeping your core, your integrity, your hope and your belief in yourself intact in tough times, because that is the only thing that will see you through.

I wish I could make it sound "celeb" by saying something like Lars Ulrich says ("That was a time in our lives when me and James used to be very obsessed with death") about the song Fade to Black, on the Metallica documentary. However the real deal is that I was not obsessed with death when I composed this, I was just terribly low because I was going through a period of growth and learning the hard way. Having said that, I also must say that while the composition talks about death, the song is about hope, and not despair. I had originally used the word "die", but it sounded too negative and absolute. So I substituted it with "fly" to give it a sense of possibility, hope, freedom and eagerness towards what is to come. Here goes..


ITS TIME


Its that time of my life,
When my eyelids feel heavy.
Heavy, with the weight of life,
Heavy, to the pull of death..

It’s time for me to fly…

Its that time of my life,
When my life’s time is shrinking.
Shrinking, to the point of no return,
Not that I really want to return..

It’s time for me to fly…

Its that time of my life,
When my soul is ready to embark,
Embark, upon a new journey,
A journey to eternity,
A journey to immortality..

It’s time for me to fly…

Its that time of my life,
When I can hear the humming
Of the wing of death
The wing of death, as it comes to me,
Comes to take me along,
Comes to take me away..

It’s time for me to fly…

Its that time of my life,
When i can feel myself submerging
Into a cocoon of darkness
The darkness of the brightest eternal light,
The light emanating from my creator..

It’s time for me to fly…

Its that time of my life,
When i feel weary,
Weary, of dying a thousand deaths
A thousand deaths, in every breath,
Every fleeting breath of life..

It’s time for me to fly…

It’s time for me to fly to my maker,
It’s time for me to take refuge in his arms,
It’s time for me to merge with the one,
It’s time for me to join the company
Of the lost souls of the netherworld..

It’s time for me to live...


This is the only song that I have written till date that does not rhyme, but the repetition of the words within the verse creates an internal sense of rhythm and combined with the single line refrain, it opens up extremely interesting musical composition possibilities.

The composition is loosely about Life after Death, but some of my closest friends who have read it before have come up with very interesting perceptions of individual lines, right from carnal to spiritual. I would like to hear of more from everyone who is reading this. Please write back to me.

Luv-n-Luck,
Av

June 16, 2008

Birthday Cakes!

My birthday this year was very special. It wasn't meant to be. Infact I had no real celebration, no huge birthday-bash. It was pretty low-key. But then again, that was just my plan.

My friends had not intentions of it being low key. So it happens that my birthday has stretched over 5 days, in which I have cut 4 cakes, have been given birthday bumps 2 times and have had my face covered with cake thrice! So for the next coupla posts, i am gonna post a few pictures of all these happenings. The first one is

THE CAKES!!










I want to express a very big thank you to all the people who have made the occasion very special by wishing me in person, over telephone, email, sms, telegraph, morse-code whatnot! I want everyone to know that I take your love and best wishes straight to my heart.
Each and every one of you is very special to me, in your own unique way.

For all the idiots who forgot my birthday, I still love you guys, but I shall not hesitate to kick you next time we meet!
:D

Luv-n-Luck,
Av

June 13, 2008

A post long due..

Many moons (and posts) ago, I said the following;

"While composing this poem, I have affirmed an interesting comparison I have believed in for quite some time now. Expect to hear about it soon!!"

And finally, after a bazillion posts, today happens to be the "soon"!

So here goes..

Composing poetry (or music), as I've long felt, is very much like delivering a baby, and here are Av’s TOP TEN REASONS why!

1) You can plan for it all that you want, but a poem will always take shape at the most unplanned moment.

2) It is really hard to make one, when you really feel like having one. On the other hand, if you take your mind off the task and relax, it is much easier to conceive. An idea, that is!

3) Sometimes after you have composed a poem, you are not really sure who or what caused it in the first place.

4) Sometimes you do not want to, or can not afford to write the poem at that point in your life, and you have no choice but to abort the budding inspiration inside you.

5) An idea/inspiration has to linger around in your head for a certain period of time before it is ready to become a poem and during this period some ideas will die prematurely before they are ready to take form.

6) Sometimes if a poem emerges before the idea is fully formed, it will not survive. (Read as, Av crumbling up the paper and throwing it into the wastepaper basket.)

7) After an idea is done with its gestation period inside your head, it will start struggling to come out, and you have no choice but to let it.

8) It is always easier to compose a poem if you are in a comfortable position and place.

9) It hurts like hell to do it, but it’s the most beautiful experience, and you couldn’t be any happier after it is done.

10) Years later, when the same words/melodies lend themselves to varied meanings, you look back at them and wonder, “Did I really create that??”

How is that for a creative analogy!!! However, poets are not given half the credit that mothers are! So here is a poem I composed a couple of years back, to highlight the brave deed that composition is!

POETRY CAN BE DANGEROUS!

To all my friends and even my foes
I have a word of advice,
If you are thinking of composing poems
Make sure you think twice!

Writing poems is something nice
Or that is what everyone thinks,
But very few actually do notice
The problems that it brings!

The gift of putting words in rhyme
And rhythm is considered rare,
But no one thinks of all the trouble
The poet has to bear!

For one, when you feel poetic
Nothing else can you contemplate,
Everything else except your poem
You have to procrastinate!

It’s always at an awkward time
When by this impulse you are hit,
You drop your work and start composing
Under a violent poetical fit!

You compose lines upon lines of verse
And see your poem through,
But if insatiated, you still compose
Yet another poem or two!

May god forbid, but if it so happens
That your poem remains uncomposed,
The inspiring idea will hammer your brain
Till you start to feel quite dozed!

And if your poem remains halfway
Then the situation is even worse,
The half-ghost of the half-poem continues
To haunt your every new verse!

So make sure to think twice about
Becoming a poet before its too late,
I just decided to write in verse once
And to this day I can’t talk straight!!


Hahahaha! Like always, I'm eager to hear some feedback from all you folks, and as I suspect, quite a few of you will be taking the list further too! What the heck, I might do it in one of the posts myself. Get me started!!

Luv-n-Luck,

Av

June 10, 2008

Inspiration!!

A lot of my friends who recently discovered my blog have asked me what the title of my blog means. I thought the explanation below the title would be sufficient, but it apparently is not, so here goes..

My blog is an effort to keep aside my geeky self and dig deeper. It is an excuse to dwell upon things sometimes mundane, mostly abstract, and decidedly always beyond definition by formulae. Hence, my process of posting a blog is a quite an interesting one. It is a process of passive response. I never pro-actively try to come up with stuff to post, because doing that involves too much of the brain and not enough of the mind!

Generally it is something I read, something I listen to, or an unexpected conversation that triggers my thoughts. However, nothing of the sort has happened since quite a few days. Well over a month infact, to be precise. Meanwhile quite a few of my friends had been kind enough to send me multiple reminders that I hadn't posted since quite a while, and a new post was due, but I told them off saying that I didn't have anything to post about. For quite a while now, I've been waiting for some sudden inspiration to burst upon me, so that I would post something on the blog. Sure, there were a few stray thoughts and ideas, but they are yet to materialize into blog-worthy stuff. Then this morning, I just looked at my outdated blog-page and an interesting thought struck me.

It was all wrong!! When has looking for inspiration OUTSIDE of yourself ever been the right thing to do??? The truth suddenly dawned on me as i remembered a few lines from the book I was reading this morning :
"No matter who patted you on the backside when you came struggling into human life, you took your first breath alone. When you take your last breath in earthly matters, you shall take it alone. How then is it, that somewhere in between, in that time we call LIFE, we expect someone else to do our breathing for us? No-one else can ever live a single moment of our lives for us. That we must do ourselves. That is responsibility."

So hereby declared, that I, Av, assume responsibility of pushing my mind to creative output, without the necessity of any external stimulation! Speaking of which, here's a poem that I JUST composed! Right after typing that last line!

ITS ALL MINE

Its all mine, my every breath
That I shall breathe, from life till death;

Its all mine, my entire life
That I must live, through joy and strife;

Its all mine, this moment here
When I must learn to face my fear;

Its all mine, this mine of gold
This is my life that I must mould;

I am the foe that I must face,
I am the friend I must embrace;
I am the change that I must make,
I am the shackle that I must break;

I am the truth I must believe,
I am the victory I must achieve;
I am the record I must set straight,
I am the success that I must create!!


How's that for no-pressure, no frills, spur-of-the-moment creativity!! I'll close the post with another awesome quote that I read somewhere, which is so relevant to what has just happened;

“Life, like a mirror, never gives back more than we put into it.”

Luv-n-Luck,
Av

April 23, 2008

I CAN!!

Again, I'm posting after nearly a month. Wonder if there's some internal clock ticking somewhere within the structure of my life which triggers blog-worthy stuff at a regular time interval. :D
Before I come to the real intention of the post however, let me just mention that I'm completely high on Joe Satriani's latest album
"Professor Satchafunkilus and the Musterion of Rock".
Trust Satch to come up with a name like that, which is cool, wicked, funny and mysterious, all at once! And don't even get me started on the music! Not only is the tonality which he gets from those custom Ibanez guitars mouthwatering, but his incredible chops on the Axe leave others in the dust and reaffirm what has been known for long. Satch is the guitar.
Satch has recently also come out with a new distortion pedal. Check it out!

Now I surely don't promote piracy, but I couldn't find the album in stores in Pune, so I downloaded it. Hehe..
But PLEASE, go out and buy the album when you can if you like it. I am gonna!!

Now to turn toward the monthly-trigger of the internal clock, I read a poem this morning and its so inspirational, that I simply can't resist putting it up for anyone who cares to read it.

Equipment

Figure it out for yourself, my lad,
You’ve all that the greatest of men have had,
Two arms, two hands, two legs, two eyes,
And a brain to use if you would be wise.
With this equipment they all began
So start for the top and say “I can.

Look them over, the wise and great,
They take their food from a common plate.
And similar knives and forks they use,
With similar laces they tie their shoes,
The world considers them brave and smart,
But you’ve all they had when they made their start.

You can triumph and come to skill,
You can be great if you only will,
You’re well equipped for what fight you choose,
You have arms and legs and a brain to use,
And the man who has risen, great deeds to do,
Began his life with no more than you.

You are the handicap you must face,
You are the one who must choose your place,
You must say where you want to go.
How much you will study the truth to know,
God had equipped you for life, but He
Lets you decide what you want to be.

Courage must come from the soul within,
The man must furnish the will to win.
So figure it out for yourself, my lad,
You were born with all that the great have had,
With your equipment they all began.
Get hold of yourself and say “I can.

-Edgar A. Guest

May you derive the inspiration that pushes you to reach the next level in your life.
I know I've found mine.

Luv-n-luck,
Av

March 24, 2008

Dont know what to name this one...

I have logged into my blog after over a month's time, after that last Valentine's Day Post, thanks to the loads of stuff I needed to finish at work. Infact I'm posting this at 3:45 AM from my office work-desk. :D
To follow up on the last post, I originally planned to write about another day that is celebrated on 14th of February. Its called the International Quirkyalone Day!!
You can find all that you need by following the link given below. Check it out!! http://quirkyalone.net/

And the reason I was going to write about it is because I thought that I fit pretty well in that quirkyalone description:
"A person who enjoys being single (but is not opposed to being in a relationship) and generally prefers to be alone rather than dating just for the sake of being in a couple."

I took the above to mean that a quirkyalone should not mind solitude, on both the short and long time scales, and I know myself to be of the off-beat kind who not only enjoy solitude, but even go looking for it.
(What a paradox.. looking for solitude. :D)
But the iconoclast that I am, I should have suspected the symptoms of getting so voluntarily classified into a category!! Hehe.. Because an experience I had on Sunday has changed it all. :D

You see, like a good teacher and friend, I left my guitar at one of my student's place on Friday evening, asking her to practice for the guitar class on Sunday, as we haven't been able to find a good guitar for her to buy yet. What I didn't realize is that for the next two nights, I would have to go to sleep without my customary 30 minute fretboard workout and the subsequent(addictive) pain in my hands..

And so it happened that I woke up on this Sunday morning with a weird feeling in my heart. I got through my morning chores feeling a bit low, and wondering why. Some unidentified gloom seemed to have settled on my existence even as I went about devouring a 250-page Ebook on my laptop. Apart from the insidious, under-the-surface sadness-like feeling, it had been a normal Sunday on every count. It was only hours later that I realized what it was. I was feeling the exact "withdrawal symptoms" generally associated with a break-up!! I was feeling all "bluesy" and sad inside, and I realized I was missing my guitar!!

Alexz Johnson crooned "I'm in love with my guitar!" to my brain as I struggled to look at the situation in the absolute perspective. It was seriously quite an effort to break out of the trance and reach a brain-space where I could shake my head and smile at my own predicament.

The little experience has stirred quite a few off-shoots of thought in my teeming brain. For starters, being fine without people around but missing a guitar can mean either of two things,

1) Finally, I am musically able enough to start taking repose within my own music and depend on it to take me away to somewhere I have never been before.

2) As expressed in a couple of posts earlier, I am so stone-hearted, practical-minded and selfish that all I need is a inanimate instrument rather than people to keep my sanity.

I know that second option is gonna raise a few hackles again, and more than one of my close friends shall surely threaten me with murder.. Hehe.. But then,

WHO CAN DECIDE WHAT THEY DREAM?
AND DREAM I DO...

Luv-n-Luck,
Av

February 13, 2008

CRUSH.. Part II

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!!!!

After I went home last night, my thoughts were more or less fixated on
it being the Valentine Day's eve and I was thinking of all the Valentine Days
in the years gone by. Also (probably because I love to dwell on the "irony" aspect of things in general these days),I was thinking of how my ranting and raving in the last post has probably left me looking like a completely hopeless UN-romantic.
In the time-honored tradition of true-blue Geminis, I hate to be categorized into so extreme a sect, so just to mix up things a bit, and because today's the day of love,I decided to post a mushy little poem/song that I had composed a few years back. Although I'm sure she'll not read this, but if she does, a certain female friend of mine would smile to reminisce of a particular Valentine's Day, the singular high-point of which was she screaming
"I love you, Av!!", in public, at the top of her lungs, because she thought I'd written it for her.
(Which I'd not, just to set the record straight!)
Life's crazy sometimes.. But anyway, here goes!


Tonight

Tonight as I watch
The lights across the skies,
Feels like I'm gazing
Deep into your eyes..

Reminds me of the days
When my life was just as bright,
As my heart burning for you, tonight..

Tonight as i walk
Down the streets of my heart,
Feels like the place
Is falling apart..

It's paining since the day you went
And it puts me in a plight,
To feel my heart aching for you, tonight..

Tonight as i dream
Of you in my sleep
I know you will return
You have promises to keep

I'll take you in my arms
And hold you close and tight
As both our hearts melt into one, tonight..



Damn!! I wish I hadn't posted this. I could have actually used it with some good effect today!! Hehe..
But after all is said and done, more is actually said than done!! So I guess posting this has been a good choice after all.. :D

Luv-n-Luck,
Av

February 12, 2008

CRUSH.. Part I

I suspect this is going to be the first post where I am gonna give away more than I would like to. Of course, poems offer a view into a person's inside like nothing else can, but thats not so obvious to most people. Anyway, here goes...

As one grows up, one's opinion of the world apparently grows less and less rosy, compared to the carefree thoughts of childhood. Ever since I can remember, I have been wondering about the beauty of the English language. However, it is hardly surprising that in recent times, I have been thinking more about the irony of it. Take the word CRUSH for instance; isn't it really ironic how it can mean two exactly opposite emotions? The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines crush as

Crush [1,Verb]: to suppress or overwhelm as if by pressure or weight
Crush [2,Noun]: an intense and usually passing infatuation

Now to me, its really interesting how the failure of Crush(2) can sometimes lead to an experience of Crush(1) on one's heart!! What is really ironic to me is that I have not experienced EITHER of the two crushes. Never in my life ( and I am REALLY thankful for this part) have I experienced an intense instantaneous sadness that has been heavy enough to crush my heart. Also, never in my life ( this part, I'm not that thankful about.. :D) have I felt the sudden and sometimes momentary rush of feelings for a single special person that is generally associated with Crush(2).

This can mean two things.
1) I have been really fortunate to not experience any major tragedies, and I have been a bit unfortunate on the count that I have not yet run into anyone who really rubs me the right way cause she kind of fits my idea of a crush instantly.

2) I am too practical-headed and stone-hearted, too disconnected and aloof, to experience any emotion in an extreme state.

Both these possibilities shall probably be pondered upon aloud in the subsequent posts, but I'd like to close this one with a interesting observation..

"DONT TRUST REALITY; AFTER ALL, ITS ONLY A COLLECTIVE HUNCH.."

Luv-n-Luck,
Av

February 11, 2008

Dedication..

Today's post shall be blank, as an expression of respect towards
Gaana Saraswati Smt. Kishori Amonkar. It is also an expression of disgust at and protest against the humiliation that she had to bear at the Vasantotsav last night.
I am near-certain that this post would not reach her, but I do not know another better way of telling her that I cried my heart out for twenty minutes after reaching home last night and that I found myself absolutely incapable of ingesting anything that could remotely be called my dinner. This is my way of observing "two minutes of silence" in cyberspace.













































Explanations in the next post. (Optional.)

Av